Seeing Beyond The Veil

As nurses, we complete annual tests to demonstrate our competency in cultural diversity. I am rather well traveled and believe I am culturally competent and tolerant as a whole.
I remember more than a decade ago as Jay Leno featured his wife, Mavis Leno’s work addressing the plight of Afghan women. It was the first I had ever heard of a burqa, the enveloping outer garment worn by women over the usual daily clothing for the purpose of hiding a woman’s body when in public from the view of men that are not her family. I viewed it as an oppressive item of clothing to symbolize and reinforce women’s inferior social status. I have heard some Afghan women now choose to continue to wear the burqa long after they are no longer required. They say they feel more comfortable and confident. I, of course, being a modern, Western woman believed the women were too oppressed and afraid of the repercussions to emerge from behind their veils.
You may have read my previous blog regarding my physician’s comment I would be a size 2 after 2 years in a Chinese labor camp. As much as I hate to admit it, his comment has taken a toll on my self esteem. As I donned my favorite pair of oversized, unisex lavender scrubs to go to work, I was surprised to find myself thinking it was the first time since his derogatory comments I felt comfortable and confident in my attire. My uniform not only represents my profession but the oversized, unisex garment provides an enveloping outer garment to hide my body while at work. I realized I found comfort in the fact that I would be judged as a nurse rather than the merits of my figure.
So, I suddenly have a new appreciation of the women who choose to wear a burqa. I still don’t want to see any human being oppressed or forced to follow harsh mandates. We are so fortunate to live in a country that honors and respects liberty and justice for all. I did develop a small appreciation and respect for another culture, however. In the words of Helen Keller, “The highest result of education is tolerance.”

Let’s be good to each other out there

My hospital has a wall with “Shining Stars”, recognition to outstanding staff members. I enjoy looking at it and recognize names that seem to appear quite often.

Two nurses who consistently had numerous stars worked another department and shift. I was only blessed to meet each in person only once as each was admitted to our facility before they bravely lost their battles with cancer. I was shocked to realize many of the comments patients offered occurred at a time these nurses were probably much sicker than the patients for which they cared.

Our small hospital is also still reeling from the loss of another co-worker who went home one day and killed herself. We are all still shocked our co-worker felt such despair and pain that suicide seemed her only hope.

Another co-worker is a 50 something who finds herself living at home with her parents due to life’s hard knocks. For the last year or so, she would work her long 12 hour night shifts only to go home and care for her dying father. I will attend his funeral today.

As I ponder this I am reminded of two things. First, I must look past the patients and really see my co-workers. There really is no “us” on this side of the bed caring for the hurting “them” in the bed. We are all fragile, precious humans in need. Second, there can be beauty for ashes. The same unfair hand life dealt my friend allowed her to be home to care for her father when he needed her most.

There really is no “us” or “them”. Take time to be kind and tender-hearted; let’s be good to each other out there.

Will you still need me when I’m 64?

I was discussing retirement with a colleague the other day and she mentioned the expected age of retirement for my generation is 67. I became a nurse at age 20 so I will have been a nurse 47 years if I retire at age 67. In fact, after 25 years as a nurse I am only a little over halfway there. more»

When will it be about our health and not our figure?

In 1996 headlines proclaimed women were discriminated against in heath care. My initial thought was, “That‘s dumb. I don’t treat my women patients differently than men.”

At the same time I presented a program for the American Heart Association on “Women and Heart Disease”. A common obstacle was that women tend to worry about their husband’s health but their figure.

I had a friend die of ovarian cancer. She said her initial symptoms were diarrhea and a 10 pound weight loss. She didn’t go to the physician right away saying, “What woman wouldn’t be happy to lose 10 pounds?” more»

A rose by any other name………..

I lost my sense of smell sometime last year. My ENT suspects a palsy of the olfactory nerve following a severe sinus infection which may be permanent or temporary.

If I had to suffer sensory deprivation, loss of smell is not so bad. I can still see and hear. It has been quite an adjustment, however.

My sense of taste is not as acute anymore. I threw away a gallon of milk one day past the expiration date rather than use it when I was home alone. Clothes on the floor automatically go to laundry (No way to sniff out the clean from dirty). more»

Not much has changed

I am a regular blood donor, registered in the bone marrow bank, and an organ donor. I would be thrilled to save another’s life.

Imagine one day as administer the routine CURE for cancer, you notice the active ingredient is derived from your own cells! You are so proud and honored to have played a vital role in curing millions, but suddenly realize the drug company has gotten incredibly rich from marketing your cells as you struggle to work more»

Passive parks and childhood obesity

As the mother of 3 sons, I hate to hear them complain there is nothing to do.  I have seen the truth in that statement as they have been publicly reprimanded for their actions.  This potential for childhood obesity concerns me as their mother and a nurse. 

Unbelievably, my youngest son was scolded for riding his bike in the park. 

My oldest son had his skateboard confiscated by the local police for merely having it in his possession.  He represents 12.3 million skateboarders more»

Change of Shift

I joined a book club several years ago.  I have read books I normally wouldn’t choose and always enjoy them.  At a local restaurant I frequent I always order the daily special.  It has forced me to try different and tasty fare. I also have teenagers.  I never make a big decision without talking to them.  They bring a unique and fresh perspective that would not occur to me. 

I am thrilled to be hosting Change of Shift.  While I do not always share the opinion of my colleagues, I learn so much and am challenged to view my profession in a new and different light.

We are expecting Joint Commission at my facility any day now. We are brushing up on all the regulatory guidelines. In The second coming? RehabRN shares a recent Joint Commission survey and practical tips to survive your own. more»

Excellent nursing care is not always provided by nurses

As we honor nurses this year, I can’t help but remember the great certified nurse’s assistants I have been honored to serve alongside.

My patient the other night was a World War II fighter pilot. My co-worker, Bea, a certified nurse’s assistant, had cared for him on previous nights, but I was meeting him and his lovely family for the first time. As Bea observed he was significantly less responsive, a son left to share Bea’s observations and update the family.

I was struck by how much I share in common with this elderly couple. They were married on October 5; more»

Overwhelmed With Emotion When We Have a Chance To Breathe

I was thrilled to be pregnant with my third child. He was as answer to prayer. I was in my 30’s and had two sons, ages six and eight at home. Friends would exclaim, “Aren’t you excited?!” and ask if I had decorated the nursery yet. Truthfully, I was so busy taking care of my two children, I really hadn’t given it much thought. I began to feel so ashamed as I failed to display the excitement and enthusiasm expected of me as an expectant mother. Was I a terrible mother to my unborn son?

Then, one day at a routine OB/GYN appointment, my physician instructed me to return once a week as he was unable to find the baby’s heartbeat. I called my mother from my car, suddenly sobbing. I was so afraid I had bonded with my baby and now I was so very worried. My mother said, “Oh honey, of course you have bonded with your baby.”

Years later as that same son began school, friends would ask if it saddened me to see my baby starting school. I truly was not sad. I imagined the hours of peace, quiet, and freedom I would have as I drove to him to school the first day. more»